I’m sure I’ll have many additions to this “How Not To” category. Here’s a prime example of How Not To dress on the golf course:
I really don’t recommend wearing “wife beater” shirts on the golf course. But if you do, make sure you have tattoos on your arms. The best tattoos I’ve found for this application are the ones which go around your biceps and look like barbed wire.
Amen, brother! One nice thing about wife-beaters, though: can’t use the sleeves to hold the pack of cigarettes.
One of my pet peeves: smokers who lay their cigarettes on the frog-hair of a green, putt out and then walk away without the cigarette … which eventually dies out, leaving a carcass and small burn mark behind.
I can’t say much. I wear clothes like while playing in summer.
It used to be that earth tones were the norm,
With argyle socks and knickers, coat and tie,
An understated woolen uniform,
Perhaps too warm but easy on the eye.
But now, for some, Golf’s merely an excuse
To dress like pimps on Forty-Second Street:
With fuchsia pants and shirts of bright chartreuse,
And alligator wingtips on their feet.
They might be summer flowers in full bloom,
These jesters in the vanguard of bad fashion,
Or birdbrains proudly strutting in their plume,
Like peacocks at the pinnacle of passion.
Although there’s no sartorial convention,
Your talent, not your clothes, should draw attention.
From Golf Sonnets–Copyright 2010 by James Long Hale