Boneheads


Got Excited About My Most Popular Twitter Tweet Ever, Until I Did Some Research

Written by: Tony Korologos | Wednesday, March 4th, 2015
Categories: BoneheadsMiscellaneousSite News
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A few days ago I did a “first look” post for Cork Tree, a company that makes some cool cork putter grips.  I do these first look posts to help get the word out about the products I receive, very quickly after I receive them.  I often take quite a long time on my reviews, since I take them seriously unlike other fly-by sites.  So the reviews can take a while.  The first look gives my readers a teaser to spark some interest, and gives the company that sent in the product some web juice while I’m doing my more lengthy review process.

As usual, I distribute links to the posts on all the social networks I have, including Twitter.  I was thrilled to see that my retweeted first look tweet (yes sounds ridiculous) had some 1,400 favorites and 1,400 retweets.

twitter fraud

Those numbers blew away my previous best, which were maybe just 100 or 200.  I thought it was a little funky that this tweet had so much action though.  The tweet is from Cork Tree’s twitter, and they only have 227 followers as of today’s date.  How could a Twitter account with 227 followers generate such interaction?

Out of curiosity I looked at a few of their other tweets and noticed a very interesting pattern.  Many tweets would have no action, or perhaps 3-4 retweets or favorites. Then there would be a tweet with 1.4K favorites and 1.4K retweets.  Hmmm.  A little fishy.  The numbers of retweets/favorites on these “popular” tweets is almost always 1,384, or 3-4 tweets above that.  This smells as fishy as Ian Poulter’s five balls in the water last week.

Magic number 1,384

Magic number 1,384

I’m not going to say that Cork Tree is engaging in some kind of social networking fraud.  I don’t care. Maybe some bot or some hacker who is trying to help them is behind this.

Either way, I’ll be reviewing the Cork grip soon.  Can’t wait to see how many retweets that one gets.

My guess is it will be 1,384.


Kid Rock Gives Tiger Woods Advice on Personal Hygiene – List of Other Musicians Now Advising Tiger

Written by: Tony Korologos | Saturday, February 28th, 2015
Categories: Boneheads
Kid Rock gives Tiger personal hygiene advice...

Kid Rock gives Tiger personal hygiene advice…

Wow the copycat golf sites are blowing up with this incredible news that Kid Rock gave Tiger Woods advice.  I love how they all type the same story.  Giving Tiger advice seems to be the hippest thing anyone can do now.   I’m sure the advice Kid Rock gave to Tiger was all regarding personal hygiene…

Since about 100 golf sites have written this same story I decided to dig deeper for the REAL Tiger Woods advice story.  There are actually quite a few musicians who are offering up their advice and expertise for Tiger.  See this short list below.

  • Keith Richards is giving Tiger Woods advice on how to stay attractive as he grows older.
  • Lady Gaga is giving Tiger advice on how to wear a meat suit.
  • Pete Townshend is giving Tiger advice on what it is like to be a woman trapped in a man’s body.
  • Kenny G is giving Tiger Woods advice on how to play the kazoo.
  • Madonna is giving Tiger advice on falling down, and a bonus bit on how to have sex with Dennis Rodman.
  • Coldplay is giving advice to Tiger on how to create sappy, mind-numbing gutless music that induces suicidal reactions from listeners.
  • Hootie and the Blowfish are giving advice to Tiger on how to be completely vanilla.
  • Pearl Jam is giving Tiger advice on how to make whiny mumbling nasal “Seattle” rock.
  • Black Eyed Peas are giving Tiger Woods advice on how to fake EVERY single thing they do in a performance.
  • Miley Cyrus is giving Tiger advice on how to twerk.
  • Yoko Ono is giving Tiger Woods advice on how to ruin the best band the world has ever seen.
  • Dave Mathews band is giving Woods advice on how to croon like a drunk Kermit the frog.  (Thanks to Jeff Weis).
  • Phish gives Tiger Woods advice on making his fans believe he’s good.
  • Justin Bieber gives Tiger advice on how to be irritating.
  • Creed gives Tiger advice on producing one product and repackaging it into the same product, year after year.
  • Michael Jackson gives Woods advice on prescription medication and entertaining young boys.
  • David Bowie gives Tiger apparel advice.  Now working with Nike Golf on Tiger’s apparels scripts.
  • Lynard Skynard gives Tiger advice on redneck culture.
  • Grateful Dead… no matter how bad they are, just like Tiger, fans continue to show up and watch them.
  • Prince gives Tiger advice on being tall.
  • Bruce Springsteen gives Tiger advice on how to sing entire albums without even mistakenly hitting a right note.
  • U2 gives Tiger advice on arrogance.
  • Amy Winehouse gives Tiger advice on wasting immense talent.
  • John Mayer gives Tiger Woods advice on being insufferable.

I’m sure there are more… comment in your own!  It’s fun!

 


Toilet Swimming Canon Camera Resurrected – Next Act is Turning Water Into Wine

Written by: Tony Korologos | Tuesday, February 24th, 2015
Categories: BoneheadsMiscellaneousSite News
My broken Canon S95, with the lens which is stuck open...  RIP old friend

My broken Canon S95, with the lens which is stuck open… RIP old friend

Who says miracles don’t happen?

A few weeks ago I posted a sad blog about the death of my trusty and awesome Canon S95 camera. The poor camera lost its mind and decided to swan dive into the toilet. When you see your $400 camera at the bottom of the toilet bowl there’s a slight delay as your brain processes the inevitable next action, reaching into the toilet. Fortunately the swan dive occurred prior to any activity, and not after.

I put the camera in a bowl of rice for a few days and upon attempting to power it up, the thing was dead. I wrote it off and have since been trying to figure out how to replace it on a blog’s revenue. The replacement was slated for 2073.

Good friend and golf entrepreneur John Hartline from Tornado Tee asked if he could take the cam and try an industrial plastic drying machine on the S95. I had nothing to lose.

After days of sitting in this machine I got my camera back today. It powered up, and the lens was retracting, unlike before. The screen though, was black. I could snap pictures which all turned out black as well. I fiddled with it for a few more minutes when suddenly the black screen came on and showed the correct image. Seconds later I was happily snapping photos.

Thanks to John for trying that. Saved me some bucks, and reunited me with a trusty old friend who was one of the most crucial tools of my golf blogging arsenal, and also one I use a ton to shoot family pics.

The camera has been resurrected. I’m frightened to look at a calendar, but I’m guessing it died 40 days ago.

Next it will walk on water and then turn water into wine.


Why Is This Boring? What Does WITB Really Mean?

Written by: Tony Korologos | Tuesday, February 24th, 2015
Categories: BoneheadsGolfMiscellaneous
Tags:
WITB - Tony Korologos 2014 River Oaks Club Champion

WITB – Tony Korologos 2014 River Oaks Club Champion

WITB Week Continues!

While I’m ranting about dumb WITB (what’s in the bag) articles/photos (see previous post, The Truth About WITB Photos), I thought I’d put together a short list of what WITB might really mean.

What is this blasphemy?

What is this BS?

What’s in Tiger’s brain?

Witless idiots talking bull.

Wow is this bad.

What’s in the baranca?

Where is the beef?

Why is this boring? **

Wheat irritates Tony’s bowels.

Where is the ball?

Whiny irritable tyrant’s blabber.

What is taco bisque?

Written (by) insolent thoughtless beings.

Worthless inane twit babble.

Worthless idiotic trashy buffoons.

Witless info that’s boorish.

Worthless information, tacos better.

Worthless info that blows.

Weak irritated trout bacon.

Wheat is the bomb.

Wankers idiots trolls boobs.

Walton is talking brainlessly.

When it tests brains.

Whores initiating trouser beacons.

Whip it thoroughly boy!

Wow is topic boring.

Wow is this boring?

Thanks to twitter followers John K and Bryan McLean for the input!


The Truth About “What’s In The Bag” (WITB) Articles/Photos

Written by: Tony Korologos | Monday, February 23rd, 2015
Categories: Boneheads

“Every week I excitedly wait for my favorite golf website to post the latest Tour winner’s WITB (what’s in the bag?) photos.  I immediately drive to Dick’s Sporting Goods and buy the exact set, knowing that if some PGA Tour pro wins with them, they’ll help my game.”

Said no one with a brain…

One of the easiest posts for lazy golf journalists is the “what’s in the bag?” photo.  This is a great alternative to actually working to create a meaningful, quality, and interesting piece of journalism.  It’s right up there with the “will Tiger break Jack’s record?” and “who is in your dream foursome?” drivel.  The web is full of it.  It fills up space and keeps Google chewing on keywords which help the website’s SEO.

WITB - Tony Korologos 2014 River Oaks Club Champion

WITB – Tony Korologos 2014 River Oaks Club Champion

I especially like the watermarked WITB photos.  After all, this is photographic genius we are talking about.  Better watermark that shit so it doesn’t get stolen and win some million dollar prize or something.

The Truth About WITB Photos

Why are we subjected to this meaningless garbage every week?  For the source, it is a low hanging fruit.  Easy pickens.  Five minutes.  An easy bet, like a 1-handicap playing a 17 straight up.  It’s also a great way for some of these journalistic outlets to pat the back of their paid equipment sponsors.  Gee, what a coincidence eh?

Is this information useful at all?  Not for 99.9% of amateur, or even most pro golfers.  What’s in the bag for a given PGA Tour pro is typically a set of handmade clubs direct from the manufacturer’s tour truck, built precisely to the specs of the pro who will use them.  Some of the clubs are custom made just for that week’s course or conditions.  An average amtauter golfer could NEVER buy a set like this.  If he could, he would never be able to hit them.

Sure there are the diehard gearheads who eat this drivel up.  They’re the same ones who own 57 limited edition Scotty Cameron putter covers…. for each of their 27 limited edition Scotty Cameron putters.  You can find them on WRX or some other golf forum. They’re the ones with 10,000 or more posts.  9,500 of their golf forum posts are about limited edition Scotty Cameron putter covers and 500 of them are about Natalie Gulbis.

Reality Check

If you are delusional, you might think you could putt as well as Rory McIlory if you had the same putter he uses.  You might think you could drive it as far as Bubba Watson if you had the same driver he has.

Dream on.

You might as well assume you could paint the next Mona Lisa if you use the same set of paintbrushes that Leonardo da Vinci had.  While you’re at it, buy the same set of wrenches your plumber has.  Buy the same shoes Michael Jordan wears.  You’ll be able to jump just as high as he does.  Buy the same set of tools your auto mechanic has.  Buy the same set of blogging tools mediaguru (a.k.a. Tony Korologos) has, then you could write blogs as good as he does.

Well, perhaps not that last one…

Carry on.

Now if you’ll excuse me I must take off.  The paper has come out of my dot matrix printer and the ink is almost dry.  I’ve printed off the latest watermarked WITB photos from WRX Digest, or was it Bunkers Hackerdice or something like that?  Anyway, I’m headed to Dick’s Sporting Goods to buy the exact same set of golf clubs James Hahn used to win last week’s Northern Trust Open, just in case…


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