Naturally the press has gone into a complete Spiethgasm. Let’s face it, we haven’t see a player this good since Tiger Woods and the numbers prove it. By his 22nd birthday yesterday, Spieth had racked up five PGA Tour wins including two majors, the 2015 Masters and the 2015 U.S. Open. He’s already a lock for PGA Tour Player of the Year. When Tiger Woods was 22, he had six victories to his name, but only one major championship, the 1997 Masters.
For 15 years we’ve countlessly read and heard the nauseatingly repetitive debate in the press and on social media as to whether or not Tiger Woods would break Jack Nicklaus’s major championship record of 18. Woods has been sitting on 14 since 2008 and there is no part of his current game which would lead us to believe he will win even one more, let alone five more.
So the discussion has moved to Speith. At this early age he is already one major ahead of Tiger and unfortunately, that same discussion has begun: “Will Jordan Spieth break Jack Nicklaus’s major championship record?” Puhlease. Let’s not put the golf cart in front of the golfer. Even if he won two majors every year it would take him eight more years to tie Jack. So many things could happen between now and 18 majors for Spieth.
In my sick and twisted mind I thought it would be great to produce a top ten list of ways Spieth could guarantee failing to break Jack’s record. Someone had to do it. But 10 wasn’t enough.
Drumroll please… Top 15 ways Jordan Spieth can guarantee failing to break Jack Nicklaus’s major championship record:
#15: Retire early
#14: Baseline shifts
#13: Switch to an inferior golf club sponsor
#12: Unhealthy love affairs… with launch monitors
#11: Drop F-Bombs in front of small children
#10: Trash his body
#9: Treat the press and fans like crap
#8: Become a PR and brand puppet
#7: Become “Ranger Rick,” hitting flawless and perfect golf shots on the range but not being able to take them to the course
#6: Focus too much on “release patterns” and not enough on knocking a golf ball in the hole
#5: Focus too much on “traj” and not enough on knocking a golf ball in the hole
#4: Focus too much on “spin rates” and not enough on knocking a golf ball in the hole
#3: Fire swing coach and hire new one. Break swing down completely and rebuild it from scratch to “get better”
#2: Fire new swing coach and hire a newer one. Break swing down completely and rebuild it from scratch to get better… again.
#1: Fail to activate glutes