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Went to a golf match today and a pig fight broke out

Written by: Tony Korologos | Date: Thursday, April 30th, 2009
Categories: Hackers

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Spinal tap moment

First I need to set up where I am right now.  I’m at a pool hall in the worst town on the face of the earth.  I hate this town with every cell in my body.  My friends know what city I’m in.

I’m in my capacity as a rock & roll drummer tonight.  This band called me at the last minute to sub for them in a “battle of the bands.”  I’ve never heard this band.  I’ll be hearing them for the first time when I play their set tonight.  This band is very green and excited to play and they asked me to come 1.5 hours before the show.  I begrudgingly accepted. Of course these battle of the bands are always a cluster f*&k.  No organization.  So someone got the times wrong and as it turns out, I’m in this God forsaken town killing time for at least 3.5 hours before I perform.  Thankfully I found an open wifi here at this place so I can write about today’s pig fight.

I’m typing out of order now.  I just got back from driving around looking for some food.  Found a lot of ice cream places.  Now the first band is playing and the band I’m subbing for is 2nd.  Oh, no.  Now the band I’m in is 3rd.  Terrific.  OMG, I just heard a rendition of Van Halen’s “Jump” with someone rapping over it.  I just threw up in my mouth.

Went to a golf match and a pig fight broke out

Today was the big rematch for the new Thursday configuration.  That configuration pits my long time golf buddy Arnie, against Sumi-g’s Marius and his pal Roger.  Last week entailed me and Arnie losing our team bet to Marius and Roger, and had me forking over $17 to Marius.   This week I was hoping for a better performance.  OK, vengeance.

Vengeance lite, decaf

Somehow I managed to hit 11 hazards despite feeling pretty good about my ball striking.   Welcome to an Aurthur Hills designed course where if you miss a green by two feet you are in a trap or water.  I putted pretty well yet had four lip-outs.

Fortunately for me and Arnie, Roger had a flame-out the back, including ditching his shoes and walking out on the Great Salt Mud Lake to see if he had a shot.  He then played the rest of that par-5 in his bare, muddy feet (pictured). Marius wasn’t firing on all cylinders all day.  In fact, he was golf’s version of a three cylinder Dihatsu Charade firing on two cylinders.   He’d bought a new driver and new putter straight from the golf shop and took them out of the wrapper just before this round.  I can safely say that putter will be heading right back to the golf shop for a refund.  It didn’t work.

Managing an 82 with 11 hazards was somewhat of a bizarre achievement.  Even more strange, I lost my first ball on the 18th hole, after I’d already hit 10 hazards.  That hackfest 82 was enough to get $9 back from Marius.  $8 more to get back to even.

After shooting four rounds of 73 or lower in a row, my last couple of rounds have really stunk.   I won’t get too bent out of shape.  That is golf I suppose.

2 responses to “Went to a golf match today and a pig fight broke out”

  1. Sounds a bit like “The Rocker” as well. You weren’t naked, were you Tony?

    “John Lennon is rolling over in his grave to hide the giant boner you just gave him! “

  2. Marius says:

    The only thing left in my bag after 1.5 hours at Uinta Golf was wedges and Hybrids. New irons and old driver=more money from Tony.

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