The Bob Hope Desert Classic is actually underway (yeah I forgot to change my fantasy team one day earlier so I’m a bonehead with half my fantasy team sitting on the bench). This one is a 5 day tournament and probably caught many fantasy players off guard.

Who annointed George Lopez as the spokesman for golf anyway?

I rant about this tournament every year. The course is easy, the scores are low and worst of all I have to see the likes of George Lopez and other hack “famous people” rather than the pros I’d rather be watching. Am I the only one who doesn’t think George Lopez is even remotely funny? Who put him in charge? Am I the only one who can’t stand to watch this tournament on TV because it is so nauseating watching the likes of Maury Povich and Ray Ramano shanking shots into the crowd?

Golden opportunity

Holy cow. The two worst musicians on the face of the planet are in this tournament together. These two produce the sappiest, cheesiest, corniest, worst excuses for music ever. These are the guys who cause people to want to commit suicide in elevators. I’m talking about kazoo player Kenny G and Michael Bolton.

With these two in the same place at the same time it’s a great opportunity to put the listening public out of it’s misery and drop a bomb on them. Let’s kidnap them and force them to listen to REAL music. Better yet, we can torture them both by forcing them to listen to each other’s “music.”

Hey why not throw in Huey Lewis too? He’s in 3rd place after “G” and Bolton. Wait… I have it. We put them all in a boxing ring and let them duel to the death. That’s it…

Glen Campbell: personal hygiene expert

Anyone remember last year’s Bob Hope tournament with Glen Campbell? When they interviewed him by some green he was drunk and he looked like he hadn’t showered or even combed his ratty long hair in six months. He looked like he’d gone to the Keith Richards school of beauty.

Glen: Mix in a few less drugs and booze and a little more personal hygiene please.

Ok my rant is over. I feel better.

By the way, Phil Michelson tees it up for the first time in 2007 this week. There’s some golf for you.